Cager - The Globetrotter's Biggest Nightmare

Cager
Cager

The Washington Generals have a new weapon in their quest to snap their decades-long losing streak against the Harlem Globetrotters.

A mountain of a man measuring more than 7-and-a-feet tall and weighing well over 300 pounds, Cager is the missing piece the Generals have added in hopes of beating the Globetrotters.

“I don’t like the way the Globetrotters are always joking around and laughing on the court. Basketball is serious business,” says Cager with a scowl. “I am ready to release the beast and show how basketball is supposed to be played. I’m going to wreck some rims and wreck some dreams!”

Cager is an intimidating force with a game that the Globetrotters have never faced. Not only is he a ferocious human being that can dunk and block shots without leaving his feet, he can also drill shots from the 4-point line, introduced by the Globetrotters in 2016, which is 30 feet from the basket.

“We might even sneak a sixth player onto the court when Cager is in the game,” explains Washington Generals Coach Sam Worthen. “The guy can just hide behind Cager, and the refs will never see him.”

Cager minces no words when asked about his objective.

“My main purpose in life is to get the Generals that elusive win and wipe the smiles off the faces of the Globetrotters!”